The cruel and sad saga of M Indira Gandhi should leave every Malaysian bowing his head in shame. It’s to our great dishonour that a mother has been separated from her child for nearly a decade now, and has been forced to go around in circles desperately trying to win her back. This is the story of a fellow Malaysian who has thrown herself again and again at a stone wall only to be told that it was the wrong wall, that she should have tried the metal one instead.

We shall not discuss the decision of the honourable justices or the position of the Syariah Court or whether or not the primacy of our Constitution is being upheld. Before we get lost in all the legal dreck, there should be one thing we all can agree on, one single ironclad law that all of humanity should follow in our often repulsive search for power.

And that law is: leave the children out of it.

It is truly that simple. A child should be allowed to follow the religion of his or her parents at the time of birth, or the religion professed by one parent if the other does not have a religion. Or he or she should be allowed to follow no religion if the parents agree. Under no circumstances should anyone be allowed to convert a minor in the absence of his or her spouse because that would allow one party to use the system as a weapon against the other. And the one who suffers the most is the child.

One could even argue that all our children should be given the right to choose what religion to follow once they are mature enough to do so. But parents are wont to bring their children up in the religion of the household, and such a notion is thus quite unrealistic. But out of love for our children, nobody should be given the right to unilaterally make such a decision for them without his or her spouse on hand.

We forget that our children will learn from us, not just from us as parents, but from us as a society, and the values we inculcate in them will determine the future direction of this country. If we exhibit cruelty, if we are merciless and heartless, they will carry these values out into the world. Likewise, they will follow us if we show compassion and understanding. Their legacy will be our legacy. Our sins will be their sins.

So let us all at least agree on one thing: let the adults fight out their problems and leave the innocent children out of it. Let us all understand that this is a problem caused by adults and one that must be fixed by adults. Our children deserve better than to be dragged into it.