Does 14-year-old Nur Amirah Atirah Abdul Majid deserve our compassion or our condemnation? Her story unfolded on December 27 when she failed to return home, having spent the day with friends. By the next day, a frenzied search was set in motion by the police, her family and the public.
She later phoned home, claiming she had been kidnapped by two Indian men driving a white van. Her mother recorded the teary conversation between Nur Amirah and her sister and uploaded it onto social media. It went viral.
The police are to be commended for organising a special task force to search for her. Despite her claim that she was in the south of the country, she was eventually found on December 31 in a car at a petrol station in Kampung Kanchong Darat, Banting, about 40 km from her home.
She was with her 19-year-old boyfriend, whom she had befriended a week earlier, and a six-year-old girl, whose relationship to the boyfriend is unknown.
At the police station, Nur Amirah confessed that the story of the kidnapping was untrue.
There are several disturbing features about this pretended abduction.
First, she deliberately misled her family. Is she more manipulative than we care to admit? She appears immune to the hurt and suffering of her parents. In the end, her lies will be her own undoing. People aren’t likely to sympathise with her.
Second, Nur Amirah claimed that she had spent her days away from home in the company of a 45-year-old man. There is something wrong with our education and upbringing if a young girl appears to be trusting of male strangers. The man should have reported her to the police. Since he did not, he will be investigated under Section 363 of the Penal Code on suspicion of abducting a minor.
Third, a news report said she had quit school for some time and had been working at a restaurant in Bandar Baru Sultan Sulaiman. Under Malaysian law, children are to receive schooling until 16. How can a minor be employed in a restaurant? Why is she not in school?
Fourth, in a bizarre twist to the story, on the day Nur Amirah was taken to court to face charges for faking an abduction, a 17-year-old boy was charged in the same court for raping her two years ago. It is alleged that the school dropout was Nur Amirah’s former boyfriend.
As none of his guardians were present in court because they were not aware he was being charged, no plea was recorded. He told the court that his parents knew of the alleged rape. “I was arrested at home, and both my parents were there at the time but they did not come and visit me afterwards.”
Fifth, when she was found, Nur Amirah refused to return home, saying she wanted to be “free”. She has since been placed under the care of the Welfare Department.
The deception perpetuated by this young girl is typical of juveniles who run away from home, and the knee-jerk response of some Malay elders would be to force more religious education.
Why can’t Malay children, like their non-Malay peers, attend the moral classes in school and learn about respect, responsibility and accountability for their own actions? Why can’t they be taught about forming responsible relationships and learning respect for others? Why do we have strong objections about teaching them the consequences of sexual activity?
To summarise: Two minors having sex. Two children are absent from school. An older man is in trouble for sheltering the runaway girl. Her new boyfriend is also in trouble because she is a minor. The parents of the alleged juvenile rapist didn’t even bother to visit him in jail after his arrest. Does anyone care any more?
The lesson we need to learn is that children thrive on love, boundaries and consistency. Giving them unlimited freedom and allowing them to have everything they want will result in their becoming terrible adults. Some people say “spare the rod and spoil the child”. Sometimes, the rod must also be used on parents.