On my first modelling trip to Hong Kong, years ago, I arrived wide-eyed with my suitcase in one hand and gripping the map of the city in my other. I found it hard to believe this once used to be a sleepy fishing village, called “Fragrant Harbour” in Chinese.

The first thing that hit me was the manic pace of life in this city. The crush of people in train stations reminded me of horses waiting and itching to bolt out of the gates at the start of a race.

Hong Kong is one of the most densely populated, vertical cities on Earth. Everyone seemed to walk with a sense of purpose as if they were on a mission. The energy of movement was so pervasive that you might find yourself walking and talking faster, just to keep up with everyone.

And it took me a while to realise no one was actually shouting at waiters in restaurants – customers just yelled to make sure their orders could be heard above the din of conversations and clanging cutlery.

So you can imagine my surprise and refreshing relief when I once saw a monk emerging from the train station. Despite the rush of people around him, this monk never changed his pace.

The edge of his robes seemed to dance in the breeze, like a rhythmic sway, with every footstep he slowly made. It was almost hypnotic to watch. And I found my breath starting to slow down, at the sight of him.

I had just arrived in front of an imposing building full of metal and glass, for my modelling audition. I was wearing high heel shoes, like everyone else.

In that moment, I felt like a guilty impostor because I really wasn’t as glam as I looked, nor as tall, or as noticeable without all that make-up. And truth be told, I could not wait to get back into my slippers that were actually tucked away in my handbag.

No one would have guessed if they were walking past me, that I was living in a monastery the week prior, and spending most of my days barefoot, and meditating in utter silence.

That it was one of the strengths I drew from, during the most challenging moments of my life. I was only there for a week, but it was one of the most important weeks I have ever spent, trying to make that inner connection with myself. To remember that there’s always a state of internal peace we can access, if we just knew how to still the mind.

My morning meditation teacher used to say, “there is always suffering but you just need to observe it, rather than be consumed by it. Don’t feed the mind with so much fear. Your thoughts will become you.”

So, if your thoughts are fearful, you are living your life fearfully. If your thoughts are peaceful, you are living your life peacefully. You can choose how to think or react in any situation, wherever you are.

So, there I was stopping to stare at this strange, contrasting sight of the monk, moving as though he was in slow-mo, through this modern crush of people, who were moving so fast I could barely catch them all in sharp focus.

So, he was the only one I could clearly see walking in such an unhurried, peaceful state. As he approached the same intersection I was on, I noticed how relaxed his face looked. I knew that look. He was meditating all along.

You don’t need to wait for the perfect conditions to get into a meditative space. Don’t even wait for a custom-made cushion to start your practice. In fact, it’s precisely when we are on our way to meetings or stuck in traffic, that it’s when you probably need to calm yourself down the most.

I straightened my outfit and took a deep inhale before walking into that building for my audition, thankful for the sight of that monk.

He had reminded me of everything I had been taught. To always be connected to your breathing and that inner well of strength. It is always there once you get past the mental clutter. And to remember to be an observer, rather than being totally sucked into the whirlwind of your own thoughts.

When we worry and we stress, we are sometimes not aware of how the jaw might clench, or the shoulders might tighten. The very definition of a “head-ache” is that your head can literally ache from the stress of your own thoughts, without you realising that you’re carrying your stresses around with you.

So, if you’re reading this right now, I’d like to leave you with a simple progressive relaxation exercise that was developed by an American physician in the late 1920’s, based on the premise that muscle tension is the body’s psychological response to anxiety-provoking thoughts.

This technique involves the tightening and relaxing of specific muscle groups in sequence, so that as you relax the muscles, you relax the mind as well. Just try this, if you’re feeling tense:

• Stand with your back straight or you can also do this in a seated position.
• As you inhale, shrug your shoulders up towards your ears and as you are feeling the tension in your raised shoulders, hold your breath for four counts whilst everything is in this “tightened state”, and then release your breath out through your mouth like a sigh as you drop the shoulders, allowing tension to just melt away. Repeat this for a few cycles until you truly feel tension has just eased out of your shoulders.
• Notice the difference in sensation as the shoulders release tension, almost as though you are training yourself to let go of all your stress, as the body relaxes.

It’s important to become aware of our thoughts and what we are choosing to focus on, moment to moment.

Try to find ways to let go of tension in your muscles whether it’s through the above exercise, basic exercise stretches, or practising yoga. As we relax the body, we also relax the mind.

Jojo Struys is a wellness personality, author and speaker. She is the founder of OhanaJo, an award-winning Yoga and Sound Healing Studio in Malaysia that is focused on transformational healing experiences. She conducts regular meditation, mindfulness and sound healing sessions at OhanaJo. You can check out their online classes on www.ohanajo.com