In 2020, Elena Tong found herself contemplating suicide, saying that felt ‘lost’ in life. “But something stopped me; I call it divine intervention,” the 36-year-old said.
This second chance made her question what she wanted in life. She realised it was not fame, power or material things. “I just wanted to be happy, but I didn’t know what happiness was anymore,” she told FMT, adding that her home-based business of making Nyonya delicacies was her only lifeline then.
Around this time, she heard about the Miss Plus World Malaysia beauty pageant and although sceptical at first, she found herself drawn to it.
“I did ask myself – what do I have to lose? What would happen if I gave myself one more year of exploring and discovering?”
So, she signed-up much to the shock of her friends. “They were in disbelief, because I didn’t really care about my looks; I don’t use make-up, or style my hair, and I have zero fashion sense. I don’t even wear accessories, apart from crystals.”
Although Tong entered the beauty pageant completely unprepared, kind friends stepped in to help. A makeup artist sent her two boxes of cosmetics and gave her weekly makeup lessons.
Next, she learned how to walk the catwalk, a task made doubly tough as she’d never worn heels before. She also had to fight her fears of public speaking, a beauty pageant requirement.
Then, to everyone’s surprise, she was crowned Miss Plus World Malaysia 2021/2022 in January this year.
Looking back, she said that the beauty pageant wasn’t just about physical appearance, glitz and glamour. “It didn’t change me into another person, but it made me more refined. I also got better at public speaking, which has led me to become a motivational speaker.”
She said the experience made her dig deeper into herself, allowing her to discover what she stood for, and her reasons for taking part in the first place.
“I learnt to accept myself for who I am; that I was good enough just the way I am.”
Lamentably, she also received crass comments online about how the pageant celebrated fat people. “I see it as celebrating people as they are. Why should beauty be defined by society? It’s time we stopped judging each other, and start seeing people for who they are.”
Fresh from winning the title, she then had to prepare for the international pageant in Texas six weeks later.
However, she found herself headed for another mental breakdown when the stress and anxiety of securing sponsorship and the various gowns for the event became almost too much to bear.
Then a friend reminded her that the Texas event was not only about herself but about representing her country. “That really shook and awakened me.”
With just three weeks to the finals, Tong still had neither her visa nor her gowns ready. Then she received news from the organisers that she could participate virtually. Breathing a sigh of relief, she also managed to secure her gowns and shoes in time for the big event.
Although she didn’t win any title, the organisers did offer her the role of social media coordinator. “They even asked if I wanted to join the international pageant again next year.”
Needless to say, Tong has come a long way since 2020.
Besides participating in two beauty pageants, she has co-written two chapbooks, accepts speaking engagements, conducts crystal healing workshops and is looking to start her life-coaching services soon.
She said she has also come to realise that happiness is not a goal, but a process that one needs to be mindful of. “When you go through something negative, it stays with you longer compared to the positive events in your life.
“Even when you’ve had a bad day, there are little things that bring us joy. Thus, it’s important to be grateful, and it’s something we have to remind ourselves about daily,” she shared.
Tong said participating in the beauty pageants made her realise that everybody has unlimited potential. But one must overcome one’s fears, insecurities and trauma first, and start focussing inwards instead of outwards.
“I truly believe that there’s a light in everyone, and that one can achieve anything and everything – the sky’s really the limit.”
Follow Elena Tong’s journey on her website, as well as on Facebook and Instagram.
Check out her food business here, her crystal healing sessions here and her chapbooks here.