When I told my 15-year-old daughter that the government might ban social media for anyone under 16, she didn’t panic. She said she and her friends already had plans up their sleeves.
“Mum, I’ll be 16 next year. My friends said they’ll just make new accounts. They plan on using parents’ or siblings’ details and photos, or have older friends allow younger ones to create accounts with their information.”
Her tone wasn’t rebellious. Teens, being teens, are known to build “tunnels” when the older generation builds walls. For her generation, technology isn’t a privilege. It’s the air they breathe. They navigate tech with ease while parents like me are still figuring out how to keep up.
As our conversation went on, my daughter told me that the world needs to stop running itself as if it were still the 1990s. Social media are “study tools, friendship hubs, creative spaces and, for many teens, emotional lifelines”, she said.
The government has said it is considering restricting social media access for anyone under 16, citing mental health and safety concerns, after Australia’s ban to impose similar limits on minors.
But as a parent, I can’t help wondering: would such a ban make teens safer or simply sneakier?
Help younger children
My daughter and her friends believe the government should target those 14 and below instead. “By 15 or 16, we already know how to handle things and communicate. Younger teens need help, older ones can regulate their emotions better.”
She added: “The people who lash out online already have other problems.”
Social media doesn’t create cruelty or anxiety; it amplifies what already exists. The real issue begins earlier, when children grow up surrounded by distracted adults who spend more time looking at their own screens than at their kids.
“Kids feel neglected by their parents. To fill that gap, we turn to our phones. You can’t ban one group and let the elders do whatever they want,” my daughter told me.
That’s the truth policy makers often overlook: the digital divide isn’t just between young and old, it’s emotional, not just technological.
Guidance, not control
Before imposing any bans, the government should realise this: the young will always find a way around restrictions.
Block one app, and they will move on to another, often one that’s less regulated and far more dangerous. The policy may look good on paper, but it may create another problem in future.
Malaysia should learn from Australia’s experience before rushing ahead. Blanket restrictions there have sparked confusion, backlash and enforcement challenges, while doing little to address the core problem on how families manage the digital world together.
Parents need support through digital literacy programmes that help families navigate online spaces safely, guidance for parents on healthy screen habits, and investment in mental health services to help teens cope in a hyperconnected age.
Build connections, not walls
Instead of bans for older teens, why not look at ways to build connections? Invest actively in after-school programmes, creative workshops, and sports clubs that keep young people engaged offline.
Make mental health support accessible and affordable. Create different weekend activities that bring parents and teens together.
Banning social media won’t teach empathy or keep teens away from the dark web. Spending time with our children, and helping them build resilience online, might.
As my daughter’s friends said: “Don’t take our phones away. Parents should just talk to us.” That’s advice the government could use too, by supporting teens and parents to be active offline.
Minderjeet Kaur is a senior journalist in FMT.
The views expressed are those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of FMT.