“We’ll always have Paris!”
In a troubled world, that famous line seems almost reassuring when applied to Paris Saint-Germain (PSG).
And never more so than after their collapse to Real Madrid to bow prematurely out of the Champions League once again.
It refers not to their home win in the first leg but to their unerring knack of finding ways to snatch abject defeat from the jaws of thrilling victory.
They do it so often that such implosions are already among football’s ancient verities.
And in a time when the game is beset by power struggles and the simultaneous abdication of its two kings, it provides some much-needed certainty.
Not to mention hilarity at their vast expense!
Founded in 1970 and “re-founded” with Qatar oil and gas wealth in 2011, PSG’s sole function seemed to be to win the Champions League for the glory of their Gulf state backers.
Untold billions have been sunk into the project. Top managers have been hired; stellar players signed.
But the bigger the names, the harder they fall.
Not even the immortal Lionel Messi looks able to turn on the magic any longer, reduced, as he was in Madrid, to an anonymous walk in the later stages.
And in a week when speculation mounts about Cristiano Ronaldo’s mysterious absence from the Manchester derby, the decline of the two greatest players of this century gathers pace.
Despite much fanfare, their attempts at Indian summers elsewhere simply haven’t worked and you can’t help but feel both must now regret moving.
For Ronaldo, it was a nostalgic return to his former club and a shot at being the final piece of a jigsaw that United fans hoped would challenge for trophies.
As for Messi, it was the only club that he could go to but one that appeared, on paper at least, to have a realistic chance of giving him another Champions League medal.
Both players were practically forced out of the door – and off the wage bill – at Juventus and Barcelona.
But with so few options, their destinations made sense at the time.
No one thought Manchester United were going to be this bad; and, with Messi in PSG’s ranks, they seemed a decent bet to break the jinx and land the elusive trophy.
After all, a front three of Messi, Kylian Mbappe and Neymar has to make any defence quiver.
But had he stayed and played for free – not such a big ask when you consider what Barcelona did for him as an undersized teen – he would now have been the mentor of a reviving young side under his former teammate, Xavi.
Where he goes from here will keep him awake at night. Especially if Mbappe confirms the rumours and joins Real Madrid.
PSG have not been able to get the best out of Messi even with stellar attacking accomplices.
And a year older and without Mbappe to feed on his passes, it will not get easier.
He’s too old for Manchester City now – that ship sailed long ago – so he may call it quits in the big time and head to the MLS.
But travelling the length and breadth of the United States is no picnic as Steven Gerrard and Wayne Rooney discovered.
Nor will there be the same levels of adulation.
He cut a forlorn figure at times in the Bernabeu, a stadium which has witnessed some of his finest moments.
And you feel he deserves a more glorious twilight than hawking himself from the Home Depot stadium to PayPal Park before the kind of crowds they get in La Liga B.
Ronaldo also has a difficult decision to make: knowing the identity of the next United manager might help.
But as the club have little idea, he may have to leave it late.
A return to Real is possible or Chelsea under a new owner? PSG?
He, too, may head west or to the Gulf. He can still pop them in: 15 goals in 27 starts in a poor team.
Indeed, staying with United and hoping they replace Pogba and McFred might be his best bet.
Just what PSG do next is anybody’s guess.
Throwing money at the problem has proved successful only off the field – and up to a point.
Qatar punches way above its weight partly thanks to its football investments and PSG has brought far less criticism for their human rights record than hosting the World Cup.
But since Qatar Sports Investments (QSI) came in, the club has yet to trouble the engraver of Old Big Ears.
For the first four years, they couldn’t get past the quarter-finals. Then they regressed and fell in the last 16.
But in 2020, they reached the final only to be narrowly beaten by Bayern Munich.
Last season, it was the semi-final where City convincingly beat them and now it’s the humiliation of throwing away a 2-0 aggregate lead with half an hour to go.
Despair will be felt in Paris. From the Champs-Elysees to the banlieue, they’ll wonder what they have to do to win what is their Holy Grail.
But elsewhere in France and much of Europe, schadenfreude will be running over.
“It’s in their DNA,” said many commentators. “They’re cursed,” claimed others.
The owners won’t be amused at becoming a laughing stock.
Indeed, many reports had the word “only” preceding PSG in trying to explain the capitulation.
Even when Real’s contentious first goal went in, PSG still led 2-1 on aggregate, having won 1-0 at home.
But panic ensued. It was a wonderful comeback led by hat-trick hero Karim Benzema, but PSG’s headless chickens deserve a massive assist.
Many good judges feel that the easy ride they have in the French league doesn’t prepare them for the rigours of the Champions League.
Yet ironically, they were staunch opponents of the European Super League that just might have given them the stiffer regular competition they need.
Be that as it may, football should be grateful to “always have Paris”.
The views expressed are those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of FMT.