A research team led by Bonnie Le, assistant professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, attempted to answer this question.

To do this, the researchers asked more than 200 couples to have a one-on-one discussion about a sensitive topic, namely a change they would like to see in the other.

The objective was to analyse the effects of expressed honesty, the way it is perceived, and the partners’ ability to evaluate it accurately.

The verdict is that it’s better to tell the truth.

According to the research team, telling the truth has positive effects on the well-being of the couple, even if it can sometimes be painful.

“We found that being more honest in expressing a desired change predicted greater personal and relationship well-being for both partners, as well as greater partner motivation to change in the moment.

“The same pattern emerged when the person receiving a request to change perceived honesty in their partner, regardless of whether their partner was being honest or not,” explains Bonnie Le in a news release.

In other words, even if honesty is not always perfectly understood or accurately perceived, the simple fact of trying to be sincere strengthens the dynamics of the relationship.

Indeed, the effort to be truthful could therefore matter just as much – if not more – than flawless accuracy in its perception.

However, these findings only apply to couples with relatively good relationships. The study does not specify whether this pattern would hold true for those experiencing difficulties.

Further research could explore this question in greater depth in order to assess the impact of honesty on couples in crisis.

In the meantime, the science is clear. For a fulfilling relationship, it is better to be honest, even if the truth can sometimes be painful – something to think about this Valentine’s Day.