Parents believe they lack the support they need to feel more fulfilled in their role, according to a new study by researchers at Ohio State University’s Wexner Medical Center into the mental health and wellbeing of men and women with children.
Their findings reveal that most of the parents surveyed feel isolated, exhausted and alone. Two-thirds of respondents see the demands of parenthood as a source of isolation and loneliness, and over 60% say they feel burnt out by their responsibilities.
“I work from home full-time, Zoom calling people very often. You don’t get the small talk, you don’t get the ‘how are your children? How’s it going?’ And you don’t get a lot of genuine answers,” said Anne Helms, a mother of two young children in Columbus, Ohio.
Kate Gawlik, associate clinical professor at the Ohio State University College of Nursing and mother of four young children, pointed out that loneliness has been shown to affect both physical and mental health. “From cardiovascular disease to depression, anxiety, cognitive decline… even your immune system can be affected,” she said.
“In fact, one study showed if you are in social isolation for a prolonged amount of time, it’s equivalent to smoking about 15 cigarettes a day.”
An overwhelming majority of parents surveyed (79%) would value a way to connect with other parents outside of work and home. Nearly four in 10 respondents (38%) feel they are not supported in their role as parents – a finding Gawlik does not take lightly, as the researcher has founded a six-week programme inviting parents to share their daily worries and challenges, and find support and reassurance.
“To have somebody that you can relate to – that feeling of connection when somebody else is dealing with what you are dealing with… it can be so powerful in combating feelings of loneliness,” Gawlik noted.
This sentiment is shared by Helms, who said: “It equips us to create better futures for our children; it makes us healthier. The ripple effect from connecting with other parents and getting support when you need it is immeasurable. It makes you a better employee, a better spouse, parent, friend.”
To alleviate feelings of loneliness and isolation, Gawlik recommends looking for online parent groups, as well as book clubs, playgroups or recreational sports leagues. These enable everyone to break out of isolation, connect with other parents, and potentially go on to organise further meetups.