Look no further than our country’s classrooms for a dose of humour, especially on the first day of school when kids will be absolutely kids – no kidding.
Some of the stories are class-ic; like the one last Monday about the Standard One pupil in Pahang who bolted from his class and ran uphill while being pursued by a man recording a video of the seven-year-old’s speedy escape.
Suddenly, the week was filled with videos and stories, including from the past, about children saying hilarious things and bawling their eyes out on the first day of school.
The boy who said, “Saya nak kahwin dengan mama” (I want to marry my mum) had to relive that moment in class when the teacher asked him why he was sad and if he wanted to go home.
There was also a little girl who readily revealed that her father cooked ketum (a plant that is also used as a recreational drug) when asked by the teacher what their parents did best in the kitchen.
Kids will be kids; that’s what makes life so special.
One day, they will look back and see the funny side to their traumatic experience, just like these popular people who shared their first day stories with FMT.
Daphne Iking, actress, model and TV host: Wearing Mary Janes to school in cold weather
It was snowing on the first day of school and after classes were over, my teacher gently told me that my Mary Jane shoes (doll shoes) were not appropriate for the weather; “Perhaps some Wellington boots might help with the cold?”
When I conveyed the message to mum, she had a very apologetic expression: money was tight as we were all in the UK under dad’s scholarship when he went to read law. However, I bought my first wellies at a jumble sale.
Fast forward to the day I become a parent myself, I empathise with my mum’s reaction and feel rather bad for making her feel sad.
When I sent my firstborn to school, I cried as she walked into school with her shiny black Mary Janes. She threw no tantrums, made no fuss and was happy.
It was the same with her younger sister who now dons her sister’s hand-me-downs.
My son, however, was a bawling piece of mess and a guilty relief came upon me knowing that this time, I wasn’t going to be the crying mother at the school gates.
DJ Dave, veteran singer: From playing on the swing to top swinger
I was, at first, excited to go to school at the Anglo-Chinese School in Kampar. But when my father sent me there, I was frightened and did not want to go into the classroom.
I played on a swing in the compound and when the teacher approached me, I began crying and said I wanted to go home.
My teacher coaxed me to go into the classroom and the first day was really sad.
After two or three days when I made new friends, I started liking school.
Dr Ramlan Aziz, sports scientist and former director-general of the National Sports Council: Reserved young boy to head boy
I was in Standard One in 1967 and my first day was not memorable. It was quite a blur of moving about and seeing new faces of both fellow pupils and teachers, but I was quite calm and obedient.
The only excitement that happened that day was when a girl in my classroom was so distressed about being left behind by her father that the poor inconsolable girl actually wet herself.
That aside, I was most impressed by this boy who was showing off how well he could draw a popular TV cartoon character of the time called ‘Gigantor’.
According to accounts from my parents, uncles and aunts, I was a tentative and reserved young boy in my primary school days.
I was not smart in an obvious way, although my test and exam results brought me to the top of the class. I was also appointed prefect in Standard Five and head boy the following year.
Lyia Meta, international award-winning singer and visual artist: The naughty kid who could draw
I am told that I was very brave and without tears. No hanging onto my mother’s skirt and definitely eager to get to know the other kids around me. I was a talkative kid and got into trouble for doing just that during class.
Mischievous, hyperactive, energetic and inquisitive, I often spoke my mind with teachers and got into trouble for that too.
By Year Two, I was known as the naughty kid who could draw. I was roped in to do artwork for the flashcards that teachers used to teach Year One and help kids in class with their artwork or homework that required some drawing skills.
Carol Lee, Mrs Universe 2013, ex-model and TV news presenter: Feeling like a grown-up wearing a uniform
I was very excited to go to school on the first day of Primary 1 at Convent Light Street in Penang, as I could see my friends whom I have known since kindergarten.
It took me quite a while to adjust to wearing a uniform to school though, as we could wear whatever we liked when we were in kindergarten. That was the moment I felt like a grown-up.
The most unforgettable incident on the first day of school was when our teacher asked us to bring some vegetables to school for art class the next day and she gave us examples, which included ladies’ fingers.
One of my classmates looked shocked and asked how she could get a woman’s finger.
There was silence initially and everyone burst out laughing after that. Our teacher then had to explain to my classmate the meaning of ladies’ fingers.